Clusterfucks

My inner dialogue is out of control.
It throws me into a state of confusion.
Feel it!
Don’t feel it.
Be quiet.
No, yell.
Scream.
Release all that is within.
I feel weak.
I hate being this person.
It’s a scary place.
I’ve lost control.
I’ve been here before.
The fear holds me down.
I struggle not having another.
A comfort that eludes me.
A simple touch to know I’m not alone.
It’s not about the words you speak,
but the calm you give me.
I can’t allow this to consume me.
Searching for a control over my state of mind.
The first step to being free is to find perspective.
How.
It’s this delusional fucking world that has me spinning.
What’s real?
What’s projected?
Am I seriously in a world of plastic pretending.
It’s so discouraging.
Yet I must accept that this is my current journey.
Exactly where I should be.
A release of words followed by silence.
Peace of mind in all that is around me.
A desire to find likeminded people.
Striving to better themselves.
Fighting for their truth.
A place where we can self succeed.